Happy Valentines! New York Gasses Swans In Time For Day Of Romance

What do you think of when you think of a swan? Grace? Tranquility? Romance? New York doesn't agree. 

Swans, surely beloved by all, especially those taking a romantic stroll around the pond.  Well, not in New York, buddy.  The New York State Department of Environmental Conservation (or NYSDOEC, I guess?) have determined that swans are incompatible with the environment, a menace, and must be murdered at any cost.

Admired for their beauty and strange affinity with ballerinas, Swans were brought over from Europe in the 1800s and are not native to the US.  Swans in New York are mostly congreated around the waters near City Island.  

The argument for a cull is apparently scientific, as swans have a very detrimental effect on other birds, droppings that contain e.coli and they also pose a risk to planes when they take to the sky.  NYSDOEC's plan is to destroy all 2,200 swans in the state by 2025, by any means necessary; shooting, gassing, trapping and oiling eggs to stop chicks from hatching.

Environmental groups are aghast, and the State's waterfowl specialist admitted that it's been troublesome to try and win over swan-lovers.  "I knew there would be passionate defenders of swans, but we can't base our management policies on the aesthetics of a bird.  I mean, people need to have common sense."