Is Stephen Colbert the only reason to watch the Super Bowl this year. Yes. I mean no. Like him or love him, the pseudo-conservative political pundit is making his Super Bowl debut with two spots sporting his love for himself and the delicious yet frustratingly hard to crack nut.

"Since I was a child, I've dreamed of working with America's premiere nut company," said Mr. Colbert. "The fact that it turns out to be the good folks at Wonderful Pistachios is just the pistachio on top of the ice cream sundae."

 

Ufortunately, you won't see this ad for at this year's Super Bowl. The Sodastream ad was rejected by Fox Broadcasting because actress Scarlett Johannson names Coke and Pepsi in the last few seconds, marking it the second year in a row Sodastream has been unable to breach prime time glory. But little difference does it make, the controversy surrounding it has only served to make the video go viral on Youtube, nearing ten million views, and Sodastream is bolstering that fact on their Twitter account citing the competition to the two mega-gian corn syrup purveyors as the real reason the ad won't reach the eyes of adoring football fans worlwide. To top things off, ScarJo allegedly had to break ties with Oxfam, an NGO she's been working with for the past 8 years, in order for the ad to run. As it turns out,

 

It is stupid easy to market to middle-aged women, and this ad makes that truth self evident. If there is anything they go crazy for more than yogurt, it's John Stamos and it never hurts to insert the rest of the cast of Full House (spoiler alert). As of late greek yogurt has been selling itself, as stores struggle to keep it on the shelves and manufacturers pump our more and more to keep up with demand.

But it seems the nudge in production has an unforseen side effect as producers scratch their heads trying to find a place for the rivers of acidic whey byproduct that results from producing the delicous goop. Don't worry, I'm sure John Stamos can fix it. And if he can't, I'm sure that titilating rumors of a Full House reunion should ease your consumer guilt. Let's just hope Mary Kate and Ashley can stay off the blow.

Everyone knows it's nearly impossible to get laid without Axe body spray. For years, the body scent manufacturers have been drilling it into our heads with ads of men being shrouded and stalked by women simply by dousing themselves in aerosol love potion. But this year's Super Bowl spot, shows a the brand waging a chemical a different kind of chemical warfare, and the reception is largely positive.

In an effort to quell the blatant misogyny and sexism of their previous campaigns, Make Love not War shows world leaders halting nuclear destruction at the mere sight of the women that love them for who they are, and that they have the power to choose love instead of war. D'awww.

Axe isn't stopping there. The advert is part of a partnership with Peace One Day by making Sept. 21 an international ceasefire Peace Day and donating $250,000 to the organization.

 

If this ad doesn't warm your heart, you're probably more self-invovled than Richard Sherman.  Featuring the same interracial couple that sparked a whirlwind of controversy in last year's Super Bowl, Cheerio's is flipping the metaphorical bird to anyone displeased with the reality of our changing family makeup. The ad doesn't make me want a bowl of Cheerio's any more than before, but it does make me happy to see black guy in flannel.